The Crappy Interview!

It is believed that the toughest part and the most subjective of all for any sort of examination is the last and final stage which everyone in the World seem to call “the interview”.

Well, most of the times the guys from IITs or IIMs tend to believe that they are big shots and want to be treated in high regards, but sometimes the breed and the likes of the very same can be on the receiving end and below I take great pleasure in illustrating one such incident where an IITian cum IIMian (if I can call him so) (G) found himself to be on the receiving end of the scheme of things that ensued after he happened to step into a room where the factory manager (FM) was eagerly waiting for him.interview 2

May I come in, Sir?”—-G

Yes, of course. Please have a seat.”—FM

Thank you, Sir.”—-G

Well, I won’t ask you questions like tell me something about yourself, because I know you will give me the crappy stuff that you have done and I personally won’t be impressed by what you have to say, just because I am different from the other morons who try to bask in the glory of the past and forget the task at hand and indeed the future ahead. So I will come straight to the point.”—–FM

Sure, Sir.”—G 

Ok, since you have got the point that it doesn’t matter who you are, what you have done in the past, considering that you don’t have any prior experience working in a factory, give me one good reason as to why should you be hired?”—-FM

Sir, yes I haven’t had the experience of working in a factory, but my credentials speak a volume…”—-G 

Again you are giving me a crappy answer. I told you I am not interested in your tags that you have happened to achieve during your so called illustrious academic career. What I am interested in knowing is how on earth can you increase my revenues?”—-FM

Sir, for that I will have to look at the processes and the implementation of the same in your factory.”—-G

See, that’s the problem with you A League people. You come here for an interview without knowing about the set up and believing that you would be able to do practically anything on this planet. Such arrogance, I must say, will lead to your downfall. And that’s the precise reason why you guys end up doing some silly 9-5 job. By the way, have you ever thought of opening your own firm or a factory?”—-FM

Not really, Sir. May be after a while when I am experienced enough.”—-G

See, the kind of answers you are giving. Such low risk-taking ability is a killer when it comes to a career. What will you do after gaining experience, sit on it all day long. You got to take risks in life if you want to achieve something big. Yes, if you don’t have any ambition what so ever then it is alright to think like what you are thinking. By the way, where do you see yourself, say ten years down the line.”—FM

Sir, I didn’t think about it. I have no clue. Now since, you have asked me to, I would indeed give it a thought.”—-G

No aim in life, no ambition, no risk-taking ability, no sense of responsibility, no vision, why do you think I should hire you?”—-FM

Sir, just because, if I had all the above, I won’t be sitting here asking you for a job and just because of all people in the world, the benchmarks that you have created might be too high for 99.99999% of the people and I am the best pick that you can have from the remaining 0.00001%.”—-G

Well done, good answer. See, now you are talking. You need to leave that “please give me a job” attitude. You need to come out in the open showing your true self. By the way, you are hired. I want to see you tomorrow 9 am sharp :)”—-FM

Thank you so much, Sir.”—G

Well, not the conventional of interviews that tend to go on and on talking about the credentials and how wonderful one is. But indeed an eye opener for the aspirants who tend to go to any level and go on compromising just because they want a job.

What can be seen in the corporate world today is implicit exploitation of the job seekers and employees, just because the company bosses know that they will not come out in the open with their grievances. Imagine a guy working from 10 am to 2 am in an investment bank. He doesn’t even realize the kind of health problems that he will surely get in terms with in future.interview

Well, you can argue that it is his sweet will to chose such a profession. Indeed it is, but that doesn’t give any company a right to exploit people.

So, all people out there, who are working in corporate sector, if you feel exploited or if you feel that your company is taking undue advantage, then come out in the open and speak against the same; for it is this very attitude that will help you take big strides and indeed will prove to be a harbinger for happiness and success.

Source for Image: http://todaycut.com/customer-relationship-manager-interview-questions-and-answers/, http://www.adeptresources.com/blog/how-to-stand-out-in-the-interview

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