व्यवहार, ज़िन्दगी का आधार

It’s said:

No matter how big you grow into,

No matter how wise you consider yourself,

No matter, how careful you are with maintaining public perception,

No matter, how hard you work on your personality,

The way you interact and behave with different stakeholders in your life, determines the real character of the individual,

Be it your wife whom you get to say good morning to each day of your life,

Be it your parents or siblings whom you get to talk to once in a while in this modern world,

Be it the driver who drops you to your office on each working day,

Be it the security guard, who tends to secure your life more than anyone else,

Be it the house maid, who makes your house functional each day,

Be it the office boy, who makes your stint in office comfortable,

Be it the colleagues and boss who tend to make you feel important,

Be it the grocery guy who tend to bring to your doorsteps the fruits of hard work of the farmers in our country,

or

Be it any random guy that you come across in this beautiful journey of life,

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At every point in your life, you get to interact with innumerable people,

on whom: you may or may not consider yourself dependent on;

What qualifies as maturity, is being able to make that all important interaction:

Respectable, 

Enjoyable, 

Valuable, 

and

Treating it as the very last interaction that you will ever get to do in your lifetime.

Not realizing that one day, it will all come to an end,

Be it your ego/persona, 

Be it the luxury cars that you get to sit in or drive,

Be it the assets that you own or aspire to own,

All will vanish in thin air or ether as they refer it to as in Vedic texts.

How soon you realize this and work on that all important interaction is your choice!

Source for the Image: https://newsatjama.jama.com/2014/06/13/cdc-report-highlights-risky-health-behaviors-in-high-school-students/

Smile while You Are!

Recently had the pleasure of speaking with one of the most successful of guys, my senior (S), who has gone on to make, as they say, a killing of sorts. Here is what came out of the conversation:

S: “You know, I have had the chance to experience lot of offices through out my life, and one thing was prevalent in all”

Me: “What was it?”

S: “The gloomy faces of people sitting in front of their desks, few seem to be having the worst time of their life, and few trying to show that there was lot of work and hoping that 10-12 hours that they are supposed to spend will pass by somehow.”

Me: “What do you think, was the reason behind the same?”

S: “I used to wonder the same. Somehow, I thought, it might be that most don’t like their work, and do it for their survival, some, I thought, might not like the team or their bosses they were working with.”

Me: “And?”

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S: “But you know what, slowly, I realized that people have got into a mode of remaining gloomy. Somehow, they have been conditioned to be sad and grim-faced. They have lost the charm of what life was supposed to offer to each one of them.”

Me: “So, how did you ensure, that such a thing didn’t happen in your office?”

S: “You know, the first and probably the only thing, I looked for in the guys whom I was hiring, was their attitude and perspective towards life. How they looked at their past? What they thought about their future? And the most important of all, what do they think about their present?”

Me: “That’s it?”

S: “Yup. For if they were too depressed about their past, or too hopeful about their future, having loads of expectations, without focusing on the present, then they were bound to create an environment and build a culture, laden with fear and insecurity. And you would be bemused to know that along with their offer letter, I gave them a piece of advice on the letter head of our company.”

Me: “?”

SMILE WHILE YOU ARE 🙂

An absolute cracker of an advice, applies to all kinds of life that we tend to associate and identify ourselves with, be it our professional or personal, isn’t it? 😉

Source for the Image: https://www.shutterstock.com/search/smile

Patte Mat Kholiyo!

There is this guy who is trying to get married these days. Believing that he doesn’t have a copyright over his so called philosophy of sorts for things ranging from getting married to behaving in a certain manner in his professional life, I am taking this liberty of borrowing his philosophy and concepts to explain, at the same time understand what he really means when he says “main apne patte kabhi bhi nahi kholta” ;).

To understand what he really means by this, let me cite a few situations, along with the actions taken by him:

Situation No. 1: A friend calls and asks him: “are you going home this weekend?” to which he neither replies in the affirmative or negative but just says that he might go the week after. On being asked, why he didn’t give a straight answer in a yes or a no, he is more than happy to reveal the strategy behind his answer. He says that if he tells his friend that he would go this weekend and if he doesn’t happen to go, then the friend would think that he had lied. And if he goes after having told his friend that he won’t go, then if the friend comes to know about the same, his friend would again feel upset about the same. So, instead of giving a straightforward answer, he choses not to and he refers to this strategy as patte nahi kholna.conversation

Situation No. 2: The girl’s father, who had come to meet him, asks him whether he drinks, to which he replies that he is a vegetarian. By answering in such a manner, he ensures two things. One is that he is able to change the topic of conversation. Secondly, the girl’s father having heard that the guy is a vegetarian perceives him to be a person who doesn’t drink. By this he ensures that the girl’s father doesn’t come to know about his drinking habits, in case he drinks, and in turn considers him a good guy (which makes me wonder how our society is good at stereotyping people and putting them into good and bad categories based on their so called good and bad habits). Once again, he manages to keep himself in good regard at the same time ensures that he doesn’t open his cards (patte).11118567

From the couple of situations that I have cited above, it is clear that he is thinking about a lot of permutations and combinations before saying anything. His brain must be really efficient considering the fact that it does so many computations and is able to take care of the numerous thought processes that seem to be going on in his mind at one point of time (which makes me wonder that he might be using at least 10% of his brains that he has, more than what Mr. Einstein might have used during his times).

On one hand where he manages to keep all the problems at an arm’s length, on the other hand he is able to emerge a successful person in our so called practical society. But one thing that I keep wondering about and am quite perplexed about is how difficult it might be for a person to keep applying his mind to things that, if you chose to behave in a straightforward manner, you might not have to do the same.

On second thoughts, when I look at things happening around myself, I sometimes wonder whether what he does might be the right way of leading one’s life and the most appropriate manner in which one can handle situations arising in one’s life.

I just wonder whether patte mat kholo philosophy should be adopted by all. What say? I guess the answer to this should be customized according to one’s own sweet will and the happiness that comes along as a part and parcel of being attached to this free will.

As long as you are not inflicting any harm on any other person and as long as it is not adopted with any bad intention in mind, it might be ok for those who chose to lead their life going by the doctrines of this philosophy.

As far as I am concerned, I find it easier to be straight forward, which at times, can and does have bad consequences for me. After all it is a trade-off. With any thing and any decision that you make, comes along the pros and cons.

At the end of the day, the onus lies upon you to decide for yourself, as to what’s best for you.

 

Bye Bye Bossiiii!

Its not often that you see the kind of bonhomie between a boss and his subordinates, which I got to witness yesterday in one of the clubs in Bareilly, where my father threw a farewell party for his boss, scheduled to retire this month end.

What you do see today is subordinates feeling extremely pleased seeing their boss depart for one reason or the other and for the kind of jealousy and hatred that they might have developed towards their bosses for reasons known only to them.

So, it really came as a pleasant surprise to see the second on lead to give the first such a pleasant farewell. Credit goes to the boss as well, to have been able to gain the kind of respect from his subordinates, which was very much visible not only in their gestures towards him but also in their eyes.

Else who would have cared to give him such a reception, especially knowing that he would be retiring in a couple of days time. In a World which is guided by nothing other than materialistic fulfillments, it was indeed an exception to the norms and practices followed World over.

The exception was not visible in the very act but in the manner in which the act was conducted, especially considering the fact that we are talking about a farewell being given in a government department.

Somehow, in the past couple of days, I have come close to a reality that a common man is so deprived of, due to the lack of transparency in our country. With the kind of work environment that our government officers work in, my respect for some of them, at least, have increased manifold sheerly because of the committment they demonstrate towards their service without really worrying about any incentives what so ever.

Its not that everyone in government is able to maintain the same kind of integrity and dignity. But those who do, indeed deserve a big applause and appreciation for being the kind of person, who is not ready to give up his morales and values for the hari patti that seem to make everyone run after the same.

All in all, it was an absolute pleasure to share the platform with guys of such integrity and indeed an opportunity to learn so much from their conversations and life.

Source for Image: http://josegeologist.blogspot.in/2010/04/farewll-to-remember.html