Doc! Is it time?

An extremely moving conversation that I had with one of the most renowned doctors in the country and a part of which I would definitely want to share with all (for I believe it’s one of the most important food for thoughts you might want to delve deep into) about what happens when a patient is courageous enough to ask whether it’s time.

You see, the word doctor in itself is derived from something which means ‘to teach’. Often people think, it’s very convenient for a doctor to witness someone dying in front of their eyes.”

Trust me, it’s the most difficult and the most moving of things, no matter how habitual we become of the same, feeling utterly disgusted with the lack of capabilities we docs seem to possess coupled with the plethora of agony and emotions that we get to witness on a daily basis

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And when a patient is courageous enough to ask, whether it’s time, it leaves us no scope and puts us under a situation which is dreaded by every doc worldwide, no matter how logical and practical it might sound to be.”

On the basis of the little knowledge that we docs seem to have, we do have a probable guess about the chances, yet who are we to deny that miracles don’t happen.”

On one hand, by letting the patient and the family know about the probables, gives them time to spend the same in the most meaningful of manners in which they can; on the other hand, what if we are wrong about the probables, what if miracle was supposed to happen but didn’t, what if the patient wanted to undergo the treatment, yet we deprived him/her of the same, and many such questions tend to haunt us day-in-day-out

At the end of the day, it comes down to a very basic question, what are docs there for?Are they there for relieving one of their suffering, do they exist because one day, they might be able to become capable of creating miracles? Or there existence in turn enables them ‘to teach’ one how to die in the most joyful manner and to facilitate the same.”

After all, the only certainty in our lives is death itself. For patients, ‘letting go’ might be the toughest of tasks they have ever done, but for doctors, may be they were meant to become a friend, philosopher and guide in the last stages of the bliss, very fondly referred to as life, bestowed upon every individual by the creator himself/herself.”

Source for the Image: https://pixabay.com/en/photos/doctor/

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Think Beyond till you have a Chance to!

I still cannot believe when I heard it for the first time,

Is it true? How did it happen? Are you sure? But he was perfectly alright! How could something happen to him of all people?”

I was shocked to the core to hear of the demise of a person, whom I had known since I first stepped into my hostel room in college, for he was a bhai not the brother from the same mother, not the dons with whom the word has found some sort of resonance, but one among a group of 5 freshers kept under the same student guide supposed to make our lives easy in college.

A gem of a person that he was, we were ragged on several occasions together, courtesy our student counselor. On numerous occasions, I remember having borrowed his notes to study overnight before the exams.

Though we didn’t keep much in touch, we took our own respective paths after college, yet it never occurred that it could end so soon for him, for death is the last thing a youngster tends to worry about, having graduated from the best of the best institutes in India looking with beaming eyes at a much desired career path.

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And then, you cannot help but realize a very simple fact of life, that you are just a speck and that too a very small one in this cosmos, a thing which appeared by chance from somewhere, and one day, is bound to vaporize as if you weren’t there at all, taking away all the I’s and the Me’s and the ego that comes along with the same, with you.

Don’t you think we start to give too much of importance to this little self of ours? Don’t you think, we start taking the Me’s too seriously and making it the basis of all our actions? Don’t you think, all the accumulations be it the physical or the materialist ones that we have got so busy with, will not matter at all when the time comes?

Sometimes I wonder, the one chance that has been bestowed to all of us, as homo sapiens, why not live our lives as if there was no tomorrow, live it in the most compassionate and enthusiastic way that we can, be it doing good for others or committing towards that one thing that you really care about and which if implemented can do good not only for you but for every being on this planet.

For seriously guys, have seen it unfold in front of my eyes to a very talented and wonderful human being, kal ho na ho! 

Make full use of this opportunity and think beyond, for if you don’t, and when the time comes, which might be as soon as the next moment for how do you know that you are getting up next morning, it would be too late to do anything about the same.

So give it a thought and do your best!

Source for the Image: http://www.canyouthinkbeyond.com/

Matter of Life & Death!

How casually do we generally speak about life and death?

Just think about it, air goes in and comes out, goes in and comes out and if it goes and doesn’t come back again, then so called we are dead ;).

If you are wondering, why, all of a sudden am speaking about the same, and if your guess is that I had to undergo any such experience in the recent past, then you might not be so wrong ;).

Well, ya, I had this great fortune of going through the experience which, otherwise, not many would want to venture into, at least voluntarily, but if it happens on an involuntary basis, then you have no choice but to go through the same, though at the end of it, you might feel, “good that it happened”. 

Before I take you through the journey, you gotta see this video:

To give you a better perspective on which one of these I am, am sitting on the left in the middle with the blue t-shirt, who ultimately gets taken away by the wonderful waters of the holy Ganges. 

The first 20 seconds or so, you tend to be in a state of panic, not knowing what to do, and how could it happen to you, of all the folks.

The next 20 seconds, you try to give in to the fact, that there’s nothing you can do, for you don’t know how to swim, trusting and bestowing the life jacket that you happen to be wearing, all the power in the world.

During this kashmakash, that seem to be occupying your mind, the words jacket pakad, jacket pakad, seem to reverberate for the next 20 seconds and you end up following the instructions of the guide, whose panic struck face, I will never forget all my life.

Having held on to the jacket, you wonder, whether there would be someone who would come to your rescue, in the strictest sense of the word, and that you would not end up flowing and reaching Haridwar from Rishikesh. 

The moment, you witness your saviour, in the form of a raft, right in front, you come to a realization that you will be saved.

You are picked up in the other raft and shifted to the original, where your companions are glad to have you back, and the guide is relieved to see you alive and breathing.

All’s well that ends well. That’s what they say and that’s what it is. Isn’t it? 🙂

Being Thankless!

Today, I got up early than what my usual time is ;). Had a mixed feeling, on one hand happy to see the sun rising, on the other, feeling a bit tired having not fulfilled the quota of my life that I allocate to sleep each day.

Did my usual chores, took my usual ride to the office and started working. Soon after, a dear friend shared a talk (https://www.ted.com/talks/jen_brea_what_happens_when_you_have_a_disease_doctors_can_t_diagnose#t-88366).

And it somehow shook me a bit.

How much for granted do we take all our usuals in life? After all, it’s just a matter of breath coming in and going out and if it doesn’t come back, you know you are not reading this anymore.

And what if the breath comes back with a bane of sorts, which takes away the so called life from you?

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Somehow, instead of considering the chores that we are able to perform, as blessings in disguise, we have got into a habit of taking things that come to us easy, so casually.

Somehow, we have got accustomed to getting hurt by the so called bigger things in life, be it work, money etc etc, instead of appreciating the fact that we are still alive and living the life we have chosen to live.

Somehow, the very essence of developing an understanding about what your mind and body have on offer, we have diverted all our energies to fit in with the societal definition of success and failure.

Somehow, I just wonder, with the thankless manner, in which we are chosing to live our lives, in turn raises a cause of concern, challenging the very idea,

Are we all living?

Source for the Image: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohxlb4j5jno

The Words of Wisdom!

Yesterday, I had the fortune of meeting a person whom I have admired throughout my life and has been a source of inspiration whenever I found myself down and out. It was probably the last time that I was meeting him.

The man is in his late nineties and is on a ventilator. It is an irony that a man who has been instrumental in breathing life in so many, is now himself struggling to get that one gasp of air and is surviving, courtesy the ventilator that has come to his rescue.

On entering his room in the hospital, the sight of him lying on a bed with the ventilator on, brought tears in my eyes and I could barely speak. As had always been the case, and true to his nature, he took the initiative of breaking the silence that had ensued there in the room.wisdom

Kush, how have you been, son?” Even in the state that he happens to find himself in, the sight of seeing someone he knows, springs him back into the positivity that I have always found associated with him.

Son, I was wondering whether I will be able to meet you before I bid adieu to this world.” He carried on as I sat next to his bed on a chair.

You know, Kush, I have had a great life and have no regrets what so ever. But sometimes, I feel bemused by the kind of importance we tend to give to certain things at certain point of time in our lives. How insignificant they are, we only realize when, say, we are on our death bed. May be, that is because our priorities and the maturity level associated with the same are bound to change with time and I guess it is a natural progression for one to be moving through all the ashrams that are so well described in our Hindu religious texts.

It is only now, that I realize what a great man my father was. What great thinking he possessed. With the kind of simplicity that he led his life, he was sure to derive immense pleasure and satisfaction. He always used to tell me about the virtues associated with simple living and high thinking. But how naive I was at that time, to have not taken him seriously. I guess that’s because of the generation gap that we had amongst us and no matter how hard he tried explaining the same to me, I wouldn’t listen believing that what I thought was right.

Now, when I tell my children the same things, they don’t take me seriously. I am sure they will only realize when their time would come. This makes me wonder about how well this cycle of life is inscribed on our slate of destiny. At the end of the day, all the materialistic pleasures and things like ego, self-esteem don’t really matter. What you leave behind is your deeds and emotions and reactions associated with those deeds. It is your choice, after all as to how you would want to be remembered once you are gone.

As he spoke, the doctor walked in, “Mr. Sharma, how are you feeling you? You are not supposed to talk this much. So take some rest.”

Doctor, these are possibly going to be my last words. And here you are telling me to withhold even these.” He smiled back at the doctor, who signalled at me, that it was time for the check up and that I needed to leave.

I got up from the chair and took his blessings. As I walked out of the room, I wondered whether I will be able to see him again and the words of wisdom that he had spoken resonated inside me: “What you leave behind is your deeds and emotions and reactions associated with those deeds. It is your choice, after all as to how you would want to be remembered once you are gone.

On second thoughts, does it really matter how one remembers us? Does it have any kind of bearing on what we are going to do when we are gone from here? And for that matter, should we really care about the manner in which this world might want to look at us?Doing-Good_web

Well, to be frank, the answer to all the above lies in, “it won’t really matter once we are gone.” But somehow, whether we like it or not, we do leave a legacy behind us in the form of our children and grandchildren. So, even if we are being really selfish and are concerned about ourselves and even if doing good in this kalyug might not be the aim of our lives, we cannot just ignore our near and dear ones, as they are the ones who might have to bear the brunt of all what we did in our lives.

In that case, the best option is to chose a path where one is able to do good for others and to others. I agree that it might not be the easiest of paths to tread, but one thing that I can assure you is that it is indeed one of the most satisfying of paths that you will ever tread in your life.

Source for Image: http://www.placeofblissacademy.com/Wisdom-Sanctuary.html, http://www.unitedmethodistreporter.com/2012/07/qa-doing-good-being-holy/

 

The Doomsday!

The day has gone and nothing has happened. For those who really believed in what the Mayans had to say were disappointed to the core and for those who feared that the calamity was about to happen breathed a sigh of relief.

For those who held the rational flag flying high, called these people silly for having had such a belief. Numerous messages could be seen of fb regarding the same. No matter what happened, the suggestion that the world was coming to an end certainly created much chaos and discussion amongst the mortals of this era.57825_doomsday-dashboard_ynv5sbd4ta5revcvdm5lwdbfglncurxrbvj6lwuht2ya6mzmafma_740x416

The doomsday never occured but the incident that followed and which has become the talking point of the nation (I am referring to the Delhi rape case) certainly is a warning to our society that, if such incidents keep taking place, the doomsday for our Indian society and for the value system that we all tend to be so proud of is not that far off.

An exemplary punishment is what our society is demanding in a unison. It might look creulty to some amongst us, but the fact is that in countries like Saudi Arabia, UAE etc., because of the nature of the law and the kind of punishment that is brought upon a person committing crimes such as the above, the number of cases have gone down considerably.

The reason might be that a human being is most governed by the fear factor and the kind of psychological impact such laws tend to have on us all. No matter what the reason, it indeed is an effective practical strategy which tends to give immediate results.

The question is: should India emulate what is being done in the Middle-East or should India come out with its own set of rules which might have a deterrent effect on the incidents that are happening all over India and in some cases aren’t being reported as well.rape__by_little_pretty

The past tells us that all the efforts of the Indian law system to curb the very incidents have not been able to prevent such incidents from taking place. It might be due to the delay in such cases when and if they are reported to and taken into the court. It might also be due to the fear of social consequences that some prefer not to report such incidents. It might be due to the inept handling of the cases by our forces which are untrained to handle the same.

Whatever might be the reason behind such incidents happening, one thing that everyone would agree to is that our laws should be able to create enough deterrent effect, so that such incidents dont take place in the future.

Some of the steps that can be taken by our government is to establish community policing, wherein the citizens can supplement the efforts made by the police of our country. Coupled with the above, an effective patrol would go a long way in preventing such incidents from happening and would certainly have a deterrent effect on persons with such kind of predatory mentality.

If you have a look at the incidents that are taking place in and around our capital city, one aspect that is starkly visible is the fact that in many incidents, the persons who actually indulged in such an act happened to be from outside New Delhi (in the present case, from Bihar) who come to Delhi in search of work and end up commiting such a crime.

Thus, it becomes important for any employer who is bringing in labour class or any other person (including domestic worker) from outside the city for work, should have a police verification done before giving him/her a job.

Another aspect that has come forth is that girls should be made capable enough to defend themselves. This in turn brings out the point that, in schools, girls should be given some kind of martial arts training which will not only make them able enough but would also prove to be a personality and personal enhancement training regime.

The guys, on their part, should be made to respect women. An effective role needs to be played by the families and schools wherein moral teachings coupled with what is right and wrong should be told to the men of our society.

Coupled with the above, the need of the hour is to have a deterrent law regime along with an effective and sensitive police force which will go a long way in curbing such incidents.

If the above is not done, then the doomsday conspiracy might indeed turn out to be true for our society, but the good thing is that it is in our hands as citizens of this country to prevent the same from occuring and we must leave no stone unturned in order to ensure that such things don’t happen in the future.

Source for Image: http://channel.nationalgeographic.com/channel/doomsday-preppers/, http://honeyimalesbian.wordpress.com/2012/05/22/date-rape/