Tag Archives: Family

UpBringing

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When I was a kid, my father used to tell me about the importance of maintaining a balance between studies and sports/extracurricular activities. He used to stress on the fact that maintaining a balance was extremely essential for an all round development of an individual.

As a result, even though my mother’s top concern for me was to perform well in studies, she too had to bow down in front of my father’s wisdom. This in turn proved to be a boon for me as it gave me an opportunity to hone my skills in sports as well as in other co-curricular activites.

Why I have mentioned the above is because I am deeply concerned about the state of parenting which has taken a drastic turn in the present day scenario. Parents, today, are more focused on getting their kids selected in premier institutes like IITs at any cost.

In order to fulfill their pown ambitions, the kids are forced to join coaching institutes from class 6 itself. As a consequence, the kids after attending a day’s school end up going to a coaching institute thereafter.

By the time they come back, they are too tired to go for an outdoor activity. After a couple of hours rest, they are made to go through the task of finishing the rigorous home work that is given to them by both the school and the coaching institute.

The little time that is left is spent in playing videogames or watching TV, as it becomes too dark by then to let their child go out of their house.

If the above schedule was not enough, the child has to go through the stress evolving from the comparisons that are drawn between the child and his/her classmates or kids of acquaintances.

What would you call the above? If I had been through the same, I would have felt really constrained and irritated, at the same time would have felt helpless for not being able to find a way out of the whole pressure cooker scenario.

That is how the child of today’s generation feels like. The question that I would like to address to the parents is:

“Do they think that by providing an environment such as the above, they are fulfilling their responsibility of being a good parent?”

Source for Image:http://www.goldenlaurel.com/kthCards.aspx

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Result Season

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Come the summers, and we all are flooded with news containing the results of the plethora of competitive examinations taking place in our country coupled with the Board exam results.

On one hand, there are some fortunate students who emerge out with flying colours in these examinations, on the other hand there are students who are left wanting and face the wrath of our exam-oriented society with terminologies such as “bekaar hai”, “kisi kaam ka nahi hai” etc.

Recently I happened to talk to one such student who had failed miserably in all the exams that she had given ranging from the 12th Boards to the competitve engineering examinations.

Her family is upset that even after paying for the best of coaching institutes for her, she had failed them miserably. Constant comparisons with her friends who have been able to make it through, is driving her crazy to the extent that she had even contemplated running away from her home to avoid all the criticism that had followed since the results were out.

With the kind of the competition that every child has to go through in this country, parents must realize that there are bound to be children who will not make it to the top notch. They must therefore, instead of blaming their child, should provide a mental and emotional support to their child irrespective of the results.

Their love for their child shouldn’t be contingent, in any way, on the success or failure of their child in such examinations or on the kind of feedback they get for their child from the society and the near and dear ones around them.

It is extremely important that the parents should stop imposing their dream on their child and should stop treating their child as a trophy which they can show to the whole World.

Source for Image: http://www.testime.in/2012/02/28/cdsi-2011-final-result/

The Saviour

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Today while watching the show Satyamev Jayate, I was really impressed by the enthusiasm and lively nature of a gentleman who in true sense can be called a saviour for the couples who intend on getting married or are already married against the sweet will of their respective families and thus have been discarded and ridiculed for the same act by their very own family and relatives.

If you are wondering what he has done, then I must tell you that he has given birth to a concept with the name of love commandos, volunteers who are well trained and adept at accomplishing various feats ranging from protecting couples facing any sort of danger to their lives, to providing them with all the basic amenities needed for their survival.

He has tried exposing the basic flaw in the thinking that is being followed and practiced by various socio-cultural groups who call themselves protectors of the Indian tradition, by citing examples and drawing comparisons with the likes of Krishna-Radha tales.

But before delving into the religious justification of love between a couple, which he calls pure love, the question that should be asked to the so called protectors is: what is Indian tradition?

We call India a country depicting unity in diversity. With a plethora of regional differences, can we really talk about a common tradition for the entire country. If not, then what about the laws that are nothing but a reflection of the norms and traditions in our society, is there any justification in uniform codification of the same?

Does that mean that there cannot and should not be any law governing our society? Of course, not! What we need though is a logical and a rational basis for making and implementing a law, which should be isolated and saved from the influence of the irrational and at times, inhuman approach demonstrated by the protectors.

With the kind of rigidity and group cohesion shown by theseprotectors,one cannot help but wonder as to how their acts and whims can be justified in the name of tradition.

What might work though in such cases and with such people is a religious interpretation of the whole scheme of things that they take great pride in delving into. The question that needs to be asked by the saints of the religions which these protectors practice is:

“Where do you think you will end up if you continue to committ such heinous crimes-Hell or Heaven?”

Source of Image: http://lovecommandos.org/

The Girl Factor

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Today’s lunch was a real treat. I had the pleasure of spending some quality time with two of my cousins and my bhabi. If you are wondering what was the motivation behind me writing this article, then I must tell you that it is all because of my cousin who is unmarried and in all senses of the word is a pure heera in our family that I have been forced into penning my thoughts down.

A very handsome guy that he is, my cousin is a perfect example of a guy posessing all the qualities which a girl would desire in her husband or boyfriend. His want-to-die-for looks are well adorned with the kind of degrees that he posesses in his name. Having achieved so much in life on the professional and academic front, the only thing that’s missing in his life is the presence of a girl who would fill his life with joy and happiness.

With his kind of profile, I am sure that sooner or later he would be able to find a suitable partner for himself. But have you ever wondered about the prospect of guys who have not accomplished much in life? With the ever increasing male to female ratio in our country and with the kind of foeticide practices prevalent in our country, don’t you think the day is not so far when we would see more and more men left wanting to start a family.

The scenario was very well analysed and presented in the show Satyamev Jayate. The path that we as a society are treading needs to be reversed. A general awareness about the whole issue needs to be created and the practice of female foeticide needs to be stopped for our own good and for the good of our society as a whole.

Source for Image: http://nazariya.in/female-foeticide/922/

Love or Arranged?

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I wasn’t in any mood to think about marriages, when I was bugged by a phone call. It was none other than my friend Deo, who is desperate to get married and is not able to find a match for himself.

He has this fascination to go for a love marriage and no matter how much his mom tries to persuade him, he is ever adamant on not meeting a girl whom his mom has chosen for him.

While having a conversation with him, I was forced to think about the pros and cons of love and arrange marriages. Without going into the reasoning and logic behind going for one and not the other, at the end of the day, what matters is that one should be able to find happiness in the relationship and I believe a lot depends on how we conduct ourselves and are not rigid enough to be not open to one’s partner’s point of view.

As you might want to agree with me that marriages or for that matter any relationship is based on give and take and compromise. Compromise or better say, doing something for your partner, shouldn’t come across as a forced thing, for if it does then it results in bad taste which might become bad enough and might lead to a divorce, and this can happen in both arrange and love marriage.

So, whether one goes for a love/arrange marriage, he/she should try to find happiness when your partner is happy. This is the billion dollar remedy to all marriage woes, though easier said than done.

Well, in my case, I think I am destined for a love marriage and you? 😉

Source for Image: http://fashionista1988.wordpress.com/2011/04/23/marriage/

 

When Down and Out Take a Break

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The post heading might resemble the tagline of a famous advertisement, “Take a Break Take a KitKat“, but coming to the point, we all face situations in our lives where we feel really exhausted and that’s the time to take a breather.

In this competitive world, where each one of us is keen on pursuing materialistic accomplishments to the extent of draining ourselves out, we hardly find time to calm down and relax and think how beautiful our lives can be if we just become adept at balancing our professional and personal lives. When feeling really down, one should skip things that he/she had been doing and instead pursue things that interest him/her.

Today, I got up in the morning and jotted down few things that I would certainly want to do before I extinguish from this planet earth like a phoenix. That’s my way of defining pleasure and happiness. What’s yours?

Source for Image: http://www.theminimalists.com/scientific/

It’s All About Loving Your Parents

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Today was by far one of the best mornings that I have had for sometime now. What made it special was a smile on my parent’s faces when I went to receive them at the railway station today.

They had just come back after visiting my brother in US. And guess what they had an amazing time there because of the places they visited and more so because my brother had bestowed them with the news of their lives, yes! they have become grandparents :). Well! on second thoughts you can all wish me for having become an uncle myself :).

I guess as a son, I feel very happy and gratified that God has given my brother and me an opportunity where we can make our parents happy or at least try to make them happy. This reminds me of the famous tag line that Karan Johar has used: “Its all about loving your parents“.

All guys out there who have turned selfish and individualistic, and have forgotten what all their parents had gone through to raise them, I would like to make a sincere request to all of them. Guys, trust me, this is the most amazing feeling that you can ever get in your life seeing your parents happy and getting things they always deserved in life and were not able to get just because they wanted to raise you guys in a manner which suited you the most.

So, don’t mock them by forgetting all that they have done for you and pay homage and respect to their sacrifices and efforts that they had taken in bringing you up.

Source for Image: http://www.mbwfamily.com/site/mbw/genealogy/

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