In Need of a Poker Face?

The first time I came across something that was close to a professional relationship, sort of opening up to me, over a couple of drinks (had to be), and the first advice that came across was, “you need to be a poker face in the office!”.

Not knowing what to do with such an astonishingly unique advice, in the first instance, I thought about ignoring the same, but on second thoughts, I wondered whether what he was telling was true, considering that he was supposed to be the poster boy of the company, worth few crores at least, going by the little that I could think off at that point of time in my life.

I wondered whether all his success came from the magical formula that he had shared with me, or was it because he was trying to act wise after giving up his inhibitions, courtesy, the wonderful drinks that we were having.

I decided to observe. The more I did, the advice seemed to find validation in the offices that I happened to spend time within.

Though, a very poor emulator of sorts, I could never get into the groove and probably stayed away from treading the so called successful path.

Now that I look back at what has happened over the past decade or so, he has gone on to become one of the who’s who of business (wouldn’t want to get into the names 😉).

Had the pleasure of meeting him few days back, again over a couple of drinks, and reminded him of the good old days and his dynamism and of course his magical formula that he had been kind enough to share with me as part of the mentoring process, admitting at the same time, that I had been a bad student all through having not implemented the same.

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He kept silent for a couple of minutes, then looked straight into my eyes,

You know what, that was probably the most wise and the dumbest of advice that I ever gave you, depends on how you look at it. 

Wise, because of what seems obvious, and dumb, because what the world probably cannot see but has definitely transpired within me and throughout my life. 

Poker did bring some luck, but never brought friends, poker did help me accumulate the wealth, but never helped me experience the wonderful emotions, which I always controlled to the best of my ability, poker did fulfill lot of aspirations and aims, but never got me the peace of mind that I have been craving for. 

Good, that you were a bad student, I just pity those, who became the best students I ever had.”

And then we went on to spend the entire night, chit-chatting about what if!

Which makes me wonder, how many out there, spend their entire lives, playing to the tune of what the office politics has to offer, getting into a deep learning mode, where everyone is bent upon how to behave and what to do, in order to benefit the most from the system they happen to be in.

Food for thought, “should one really care about the same, and do you really need a poker face to succeed?

Source for Image: http://www.parkingsuns.com/2015/04/16/parkinsons-poker-face-pays-off-pedagogically/

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Does being Apped means losing Humanity?

Evolution is inevitable, but have you ever wondered that we would evolve so much so as to have our entire lives and generation apped.

Ya, that’s the buzz word. Possibly anything that you can think of at the moment has been put as a service/product which can be accessed through an app. It was only yesterday that I came to know, that an app exists for funeral services as well for those who are not able to make it in time for the last riots of their loved ones.

Can you believe it? An app for a funeral service? Ironically, on one hand, where it is extraordinarily funny because of our socialization process, the way we all have been brought up in India, on the other, being apped means lot of convenience.

It means the time that earlier you might have so called wasted, can now be utilized for more productive work, though I still believe the entire concept can be questioned.

We are spending more than 70% of our time, either on our laptops or our mobile phones. Our real life conversations have gone down.

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If I were to picture a typical ITied family, you would see the husband and wife doing something on their respective IT platforms and the kid, who might have just been introduced to the likes, would be trying to add friends on Whatsapp or Fb.

What we earlier referred to as the family time has now got transformed into IT time. Father doesn’t seem to have time to spend with his kids, wife or parents. The wife, especially if she is a house-wife seemed to have found some abode in the arms of the virtual. The kids love the alley of the technology that they seem to be racing into.

The only ones who are left out in this entire ITionization or Appionization or whatever you might want to refer to as are the parents of the grownups or the generation that gave birth to the so called successful techies.

I know, some of us, would want to argue, that IT has helped us remain connected with our parents. At least we have an option to either do a skype or video calling sitting somewhere in US.

I just wonder, when we were young, and when we needed our parents’ attention the most, be it being fed when we were hungry or be it when we craved for their attention when we were hurt, if our parents were to come and tell us that they were appified, I bet we wouldn’t have liked it.

It’s our time, it’s our physical presence, it’s us providing the much wanted emotional support and attention, that our parents need the most, when they become old.

Where on one hand, it’s good to learn new things, keep oneself updated with what’s happening, on the other hand, we should try not to become so ITied or apped, where we tend to lose the very essence and foundation of humanity and love.

Source for Image: https://twitter.com/appstore

The Dreaded Review!

It’s again the same time of the year when the ever so dreaded at the same time looked forward to term, review, will take place or has already taken place for the majority who work in order to make a living.

More often than not, many would think that the boss has not been fair in evaluating all aspects of the work that you might have done in the year gone by.

Many might perceive that due credit has not been given to for what you accomplished and somewhere the credit has been bagged by a colleague whom you believe might have performed at a level which might be far less than what you perceive to have performed at.

Have you ever wondered, what this review consist of? No matter how much you want to rationalize and make the entire process logical and fair, that’s what the HR department all over the world aim at and claim to be doing, the thing that matters the most is how well you are able to cope up with relationships in your ecosystem.

Be it your home or in office, what matters the most is your ability to get along well with people with different opinions and mindset and to be able to build a genuine healthy relationship with all.

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And that in no way is suggesting that one should fool around and be political about the entire aspect, but have a fairly high level of compassion and integrity when it comes to be able to slip into others’ shoes and see the world from their perspective.

Harder done than said, one who is able to accomplish this feat, never seems to have a bad review, be it the wife at home, or be it the boss in the office, be it the parents waiting to get a call from their loved ones or be it the sons and daughters waiting for their mom or dad to come back and spend quality time with them.

I would admit that there have been people who have crossed my path on several occasions who have been an inspiration in the true sense of the word. They have taught me how to handle situations or more importantly how to perceive the situation in the first instance.

Such men/women are exemplary in everything they do. They tend to have a positive bent of mind and look at things very differently from the rest of us. These people take success and failure (which comes very seldom) in the same stride.

These are the men/women, who wouldn’t want to focus on the past, having drawn their learning, and would instead focus on the present. They would be more interested in what didn’t work rather than why it didn’t work.

Such are the people that one should try to associate with, learn from them, get inspired and even emulate the aspects which make them so wonderful and different. After all, it’s better to have people with a positive attitude surrounding you compared to people who are always whining or complaining about one thing or the other.

Friends, reviews will come and go, sometimes they will be good at times bad, but what will matter the most is your ability to motivate yourself to become a better individual each minute, each hour and each day of your lives.

Source for Image: http://mobile-spyreviews.com/mobistealth_reviews/

The Other World!

A short story, titled “The Other World” that I had written sometime back, would love to share with all. Have fun reading ;)!

She willed herself to not check her phone to see if he had replied. It had been about three days now. She hated that she was constantly checking his ‘last seen at’ status and yes, he had logged in just five minutes ago. Yet she couldn’t stop herself. This sinking feeling to find absolutely no communication from him was becoming unbearable, almost torturous.

And then, just as she sat down in her chair, her phone vibrated. With her heart thudding in her ear, she unlocked her phone and stared at the screen. Finally! It was his message.

But when she opened it and read it, she nearly stopped breathing. She didn’t know if he was joking or not. What was this?

“Ishika, listen very carefully. This might be my last message to you. I am trapped. I can barely move from my bed. It’s hard to believe but there is some unseen force in my house, I have no idea how to describe. It’s not letting me go out of my house. I took her permission to go to the washroom and managed to bring this phone along. She is calling me now. I have to go. HELP ME!” Ishika could feel a wave of shiver run down her spine.

“Has Sameer lost his mind? What unseen force? Trapped? How is it possible? I don’t believe this crap?” Ishika tried calling Sameer as the thoughts flooded her mind.

There was no answer. She tried calling him again but to her utter despair the phone was switched off on this occasion.

“Is Sameer playing a prank, if he is then it’s not funny at all. I would kill him for this. What if he is not? What if he is telling me the truth? What if there was an unseen force?” Ishika, though had heard of paranormal before and had always been an avid non-believer, yet she didn’t know how to react.

On one hand, she wondered and internally hoped that Sameer was playing another of his pranks, on the other hand she felt too terrified to respond to the message.

Gathering her wits, Ishika decided to call Sameer’s best friend, Ankan, who lived not so far from his house and who could go and check up on Sameer if everything was fine.

“Hi Ankan. This is Ishika. I haven’t heard from Sameer since three days now. He told me that his parents are also not in town. I was a bit worried. Can you please go to his house and see if he is alright?”

“Ishika, everything is fine. He is busy working on one of his projects that he told me about. He even cancelled our plan of going to the football match. You know how these budding scientists are sometimes. He said that he needed few days off to focus on this project.” Ankan tried calming Ishika who sounded extremely worried and terrified on the phone.

“I know Ankan that he is working, but never have this kind of thing happened before. He always used to send me a text or call me at least once, whenever he used to work on his projects before. But this time around there hasn’t been any communication from his side for 3 days. Please Ankan, can you go and see, if he is alright! For me, please!”

Ishika didn’t want to share the details of the only message she had received from Sameer in three days, one because she didn’t want to scare the hell out of Ankan, for Ankan was a firm believer in the existence of another World out there and whom she knew was so scared of watching horror movies that if at all he would see them, it would be in broad daylight and two because if Sameer was playing a prank, she didn’t want to look like a fool in front of Ankan.

“Ok Ishika. I will go to his house right away. Let me call you back once I am there.” Though Ankan was pretty sure of what Sameer was up to, yet for Ishika’s sake, he decided to break the promise that he had given to Sameer three days back of not visiting him until Sameer asked him to.

Sameer, or Genius, as his friends used to refer to him as, was an outright scholar from his childhood days, a prodigy hard to be ignored and an intellect which his friends believed could even give Einstein a run for his money.

He had gone on to graduate from one of the most prestigious institutes in India by the name of IIT or Indian Institute of Technology, Kanpur and following up on his love for Computer Science and Artificial Intelligence, had done a Masters and a PhD in Cognitive Sciences.

It was in IIT Kanpur that he had met the love of his life, Ishika, who had gone on to pursue her ambitions of having a successful career in the world of advertising while Sameer was doing his PhD and now resided in the city that never slept, Mumbai.

Sameer, after having completed his studies, had decided to become a visiting professor in his Alma Mater at the same time pursue research in his favourite discipline. For this, he had set up a lab in his father’s house in the beautiful hill town of Nainitaal, where his father, after having served in the coveted Indian Administrative Service (IAS) for over a period of three decades, had decided to settle down amidst the lush green woods.

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Sameer’s parents were aware and approved of the budding scientist’s relationship with the beautiful Advertiser. Ishika used to visit their house whenever she got a break from her grueling schedule and when Sameer could escape his duties of a visiting faculty member.

Everyone around Sameer knew that he had lately become interested in the World of Paranormal activities and had started working on a project, which he said would change the way people perceived the “other world”. He had even named his project, “The Other World”.

As Ankan walked towards Sameer’s house, he remembered having that last discussion with Genius:

“Ankan, I would have to cancel our plan of going for the match.”

“But why? Don’t you know we had been planning this for quite some time now? You can work on your project later. It’s just a matter of a couple of hours.” Ankan tried convincing Sameer.

“Ankan, I cannot even if I want to. I have reached a stage in my project where I am not allowed to leave my house anymore.” Ankan looked bemused.

“What do you mean, you are not allowed to? Is this some kind of a joke, Sameer?”

“I didn’t tell you Ankan, but I have done something which the other world didn’t want me to. I have broken their laws and now they want to punish me for what I have done.”

“Who are they? And what are you talking about? Sameer, now you are scaring me to death.”

“I was just kidding, Ankan. Just that I am too caught up with the thing.” Seeing Ankan worried, Sameer thought of chucking it off.

And that was it. Ankan hadn’t heard from Sameer for three days, similar to what Ishika had experienced.

As Ankan approached his house, he could feel a sense of unusualness about the surroundings. Yes, Sameer’s house was located on a hill top with only 2 other houses in the vicinity, but this time around he could feel a cold breeze which seemed to be cooler than the normal, which was an aberration considering that it was the month of April.

By the time Ankan could manage to reach the door and ring the bell, it was already 5’oclock in the evening.

“Where is everyone? His servants, gardener?” Ankan felt nervous seeing no one respond to the bell.

On most occasions when Ankan had visited Sameer’s house, there would be a person working outside, and the door would generally be open, but this time around, it was closed and no one could be heard. He could even hear the sound of the cold breeze blowing in his face and hair.

He rang the bell for the second time. There was no response on this occasion as well.

“Sameer might have gone for a cup of tea to his favourite tea-stall just half a kilometre walk down the hill, where he goes whenever he wants a break from his project. The servants might have gone for the ration” Ankan sat on a chair lying in the garden and decided to call Ishika in the meantime, waiting for the Genius to come back from his tea session.

“Ishika, this is Ankan. I have reached Sameer’s house. No one is here. He might have gone for his tea break.”

“How is it possible, Ankan?” Ishika decided to tell Ankan the truth behind the message that she had got from Sameer’s phone.

“Why didn’t you tell me before? Let me get some help….” Ankan could barely speak when the phone got disconnected.

“Hello Ankan! Ankan…” Ishika tried calling Ankan only to hear that the phone had been switched off.

In Mumbai, Ishika paced around in the living room waiting for Ankan to call her back.

It was already midnight and Ishika hadn’t received any communication neither from Ankan nor from Sameer. She didn’t know anyone other than Ankan and Sameer’s parents in Nainitaal, whom she could call. Two options lay in front of her.

Either she could wait for Ankan to call her back or opt for a 12 hour long journey from Mumbai to Nainitaal, which incorporated a 2 hour flight from Mumbai to Lucknow and a 10 hour drive from Lucknow to Nainitaal.

Ishika decided to take the flight 6 a.m. next morning, hoping that Ankan would call her in any case. She couldn’t sleep the entire night waiting for Ankan to call her back. As she sat in the Indigo flight and closed her eyes, she wished that her fears should never come true.

Having not had even an hour of sleep the previous night, Ishika immediately fell asleep. Two hours passed in a flash and when she opened her eyes, the flight had landed in Lucknow.

As Ishika came out of the airport, she could see her all-time college friend Shreya, whom Ishika had told everything the previous night and who had offered to drive Ishika to Nainitaal.

As they both drove towards Nainitaal, Ishika couldn’t help but think and worry at the same time about the scheme of events that had ensued previous night. On one hand, where she prayed for Sameer’s safety, on the other hand she felt nervous and terrified remembering the message that Sameer had sent her last night.

By the time Shreya and Ishika could reach Sameer’s house, it was already 7 p.m. They could barely see any signs of life in the vicinity. The only sign of hope was a street light located right outside Sameer’s house.

“Why is there no light here, Ishika? We should call for help. I am really scared.” Shreya looked terrified witnessing the silence and seeing no one around.

“Let’s go and ring the bell. I am sure the servants would be around. If not, we will go down the hill and report in the police station.” Ishika stood there shivering right outside Sameer’s house trying to assure herself more than Shreya that everything was alright.

As Ishika moved towards the door and was about to ring the bell, the silence was broken by a deafening sound of crackers and she could witness flood lights on her with Sameer having opened the door and kneeling down on his knees with a ring in his hand.

“Ishika, will you marry me?” Ishika stood there terrified

She could hardly believe what was happening. It felt like a dream. It took her sometime to regain her composure. She could now see her relatives including her parents, her college friends, Sameer’s parents, Ankan and his friends, who by then had come out of the house and stood there next to the couple.

“No. I won’t. What is all this, Sameer? How could you do this? Did you know how scared I was? How could you even think of such a prank?” Tears flew down Ishika’s cheeks.

“Ishika, I wanted to give you a surprise. I wanted to make it special for you.” Sameer held Ishika in her arms as a smile started appearing on her face.

“What is this other world project? Ankan, I didn’t expect this from you.” Ishika looked at Sameer’s perceived partner in crime.

“Ankan is not to be blamed, Ishika. It was all my idea He didn’t have a clue of what was going on. This other world is the world after marriage, Ishika. It’s the world that we will be starting together. It’s the world that we will be creating and living all our lives. Ishika, will you be mine forever and ever?” Sameer stood there extending his hand towards Ishika.

“Yes. Do you even have the slightest of doubts?” Ishika smiled back and put her hand on Sameer’s.

As Sameer put the ring on Ishika’s finger and as she could hear everyone clapping, she took a moment to close her eyes thanking the Almighty for fulfilling her dream of getting married to the love of her life.

The deal was done, signed and both Sameer and Ishika were all set to step into the Other World which welcomed them both with open arms.

Source for Image: http://www.pxleyes.com/photoshop-picture/4f2a968c3ad9e/Gate-to-other-world.html

Doing what you Love?

It’s really heartening to see many batch mates of mine and otherwise as well, young folks plunging themselves into this wonderful and exciting arena of start ups, few forming their own ventures and others becoming a part of the ecosystem, joining the founders in their journey towards solving one or another issue that a modern consumer faces in today’s hectic style of living that all have got so accustomed to, thanks to the materialism which all of us tend to be running after, voluntarily or involuntarily, getting inspired from the rat race.

On one hand where it’s a real pleasure to witness the above, on the other, I cannot help but wonder what makes people to be drawn into this world of startups and entrepreneurship. Is it because of the extreme distress and dissatisfaction that they tend to face in their current jobs? Is it because they perceive a chance to make it big sometime in the near future and thus choose to join the bandwagon? Is it because that’s the in thing to do and coming from a generation that is into everything that’s in, how can one miss upon yet another in-thing? Is it because of the freedom and ability to decide upon one’s schedule? or Is it because of the thought of being able to make a difference?

Whatever it might be, the reality today is, that even students graduating from the likes of IITs and IIMs are either grabbing start up offers or preferably forming their own ventures in collaboration with their colleagues.

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No matter how successful one goes on to become, with success being gauged from the amount of VC capital pouring in, one aspect that is found to be lacking in nearly 99% (might be less 😉 ) of startups today is the ability to go from “zero to one“.

Though one gets to see innovations in the manner in which the start up is being run, yet more often than not, either they are carbon copies of the flourishing ones in Europe or America or are the same of the ones operating in the Indian ecosystem, primarily a meta-copy of our much aspired western neighbours.

This makes me wonder even more whether the choices that we are making is influenced for the love of success or for the love of what we actually want to do and might love doing. As is said, “chadte suraj ko sab salaam karte hain“, would just like to add, “kahin suraj itna na chadh jaye ki wo badalon mein aisa kho jaye ki koi use dekh bhi na paye aur fir wo khud se pooche, kaash!

Source for Image: http://smspunch.net/single-article-forum-post-3412.aspx

The First One!

Have you ever wondered why so much of importance is given to the firsts by our society, so much so that an entire advertisement was dedicated to as to who would be first to win the Indian Football League.

Why this fascination with the first? Isn’t second more or less the same as the first. After all, isn’t it just a number that was invented by I don’t know who, but someone intelligent enough to understand the very fundamentals of numerology.

The first kiss, the first girlfriend, the first and hopefully the only wife, the first baby, the first book you read, the first teacher whom you had a crush on in your school or college, the first time you won a medal, the first time you stood first in class, the first rank in a competitive examination; all the above have immense significance attributed to by the who’s who of our society. first one

To be honest, when I started writing this article, I had someone on my mind, but the time interval between having someone on my mind and having started actually penning down my thoughts, it took a different turn altogether.

And I deviated from writing about that someone to this particular one. Now coming back to that someone, and dedicating it to all those who believe that love happens just once, अर्ज़ किया है:

” ऐसा नहीं था कि तुम सबसे हसीं थे,
हाँ पर ये ज़रूर था कि बस तुम ही तुम थे,
तुम्हे देखने को जी ललचाता था,
तुम्हे ना देख पाने पर, मंन रूठ जाता था,
तुम्हारी एक झलक के लिए हम कुछ भी कर जाते थे,
फिर भी कभी कभी हम तुम्हे समझ में ना आते थे,
दिल से बस यही फरियाद निकलती थी,
एक बार जीने को फिर से उम्मीद हो उठती थी,
कहते थे हम सबसे कि हमें तुम मिल गए हो,
मानो जैसे खुद के तुम फ़रिश्ते बन गए हो….”

Source for Image: http://www.internationalstudentinsurance.com/summer-fun-competition/

The Gift of Life!

Guys, I would like to make a confession today. A couple of months back, when I came to reside in what I call the Biryani city, Hyderabad and all of a sudden, when one of my friends asked me as to when I got married, I was unable to tell him the date.

No matter how much I want to justify this, I cannot do so. So, I won’t even try. That night itself while talking to my wife, I told her about what ensued during the day and she was really bemused by the incident at the same time might have wondered what kind of husband have I got who doesn’t even remember our marriage date.

I know for sure, that little things in life give us more happiness than what you really think they will. I know it’s about living those little yet wonderful moments in your life and building on each one of them to write what you call the story of your life.

I have been lucky enough to have a life partner who understands what kind of story I would want to write, with her besides me. I know, she might not really agree to my conception of life that I have, yet she is giving enough to let me have my own space to live it on my own sweet will.gift

Trust me, when you have one aspect of your life so settled, you don’t feel the stress and you don’t have a tendency to fall into the insecurity trap, which most of the guys at my age tend to get into thinking about the uncertainties of the future.

If you are wondering, why the hell I am talking about my personal stuff today, yes you guessed it right, today is my marriage anniversary and this post is not only dedicated to my wonderful wife but to all the beautiful ladies around the globe who believe in living life to the fullest.

If I start talking about the other wonderful ladies, then I would have it from my wife, also from the husbands of other ladies, therefore would focus on talking about just my wife ;).

Now, what do I say about her. The more I see her, the more I fall in love with her. The more I talk to her, the more I feel closer to her. The more I admire what she does for me or my family, the more respect I have for her. The more I think about her professional side, the more I wonder how can a woman manage her professional and personal life so well without any complaints what so ever.

Trust me again that I am not a very easy man to spend one’s life with. I am far far off from what comes under the category of an ideal man that every girl would want to have. Yet, she loves me. Yet she thinks about us before she thinks about herself. Yet she takes care of my parents as if they were her own. Yet she does every possible thing and makes every possible effort in the World to make me happy.

I think I must have done something really good in my previous birth, that I got a life partner as wonderful as hers. She always complaints to me that I don’t give her enough gifts. Today, I want to tell her, that she is the biggest gift of my life and all my gifts are so small as compared to the gift that God has given me in this life of mine.

I wish you a very happy anniversary baby. I love you.

Source for Image: http://www.themillions.com/2014/12/beyond-bookmarks-10-gifts-for-readers.html

The Exploration!

For the past couple of days, I have been conversing a lot with some old friends, family members and some new friends that I have made over these past couple of days. 

Don’t know why and how but somehow the conversations have revolved around the basic theme of what we all want from life. Might be that we all are if not a little concerned but surely trying to find answer to the biggest mystery that seems to surround us all. 

If you are wondering how and when we will be able to decipher the same, then my dear friend, I must tell you that it might take an entire lifetime to do so, not sure for certain that you will be able to reach the pinnacle of discovering the same.But the journey of being able to explore the same seems to be exciting in itself. 

As far as I am concerned, life for me is discovering who you are and then trying to live life to your own sweet will. But I must be kidding when I make that naive suggestion that we don’t know who we are, right!

Well, to be brutally frank, we don’t want to know our inner self. We are too engrossed in the nitty-gritty of life so as to ignore the real aspects associated with the same. The biggest question though is why should we all try to delve into the deeper and inner aspects? After all, we are all happy living the way we are                             images 

We can go on debating on whether the kind of happiness that we all experience in our day-to-day life is real or not, but let me present a perspective which might ring some bells in your mind.

Consider a state A, where you are happy (though I would want to call it pseudo happiness) and consider another state B, where you know for sure that you will be healthier and happier. Wouldn’t you want to go  from A to B? The only catch here is that while going from A to B, you might have to face certain challenges and might have to delve into certain kinds of explorations which you might not be prepared for at the moment.

Would you then want to give up to the fact that you might not have the courage and possibly the skill set to be able to explore the world in order to reach state B? Would you be tame enough to treat pseudo happiness as the real happiness or would you want to explore the myth behind the same? Would you want to continue living in the hope that some day someone would come and give you salvation or would you be brave enough to explore your own path to salvation?

These are questions for which answers can only be found once we dive into the exploration of our own lives. This, in no way, implies giving up your life as a professional and move into the woods to do the same. Just that, you need to modify the way you live and think and perceive a tad bit and you will notice a considerable amount of change in your psyche.

This will surely lead to a better understanding of who your are and would in turn result in a much healthier and happier lifestyle. 

The choice is yours. Whether you want to continue living your life in a web created by the who’s who of your personal society or you want to make yourself feel free from the pseudo bonds that you seem to have accepted as the real truth.

Just need to go out there and start exploring and that is what our life might have wanted from us the moment we took that first little step in the enclosures of our protected households. 

Source for Image: http://www.nationalgeographic.com/125/the-new-age-of-exploration/

Shopping Wopping!

I would want to believe that majority of guys don’t like shopping when it comes to your wives and girlfriends dragging you to the market place especially after a plethora of emotional dialogues and blackmail, and leaving you with no other choice but to comply to their sweet will.

Some of you might toe in line and pretend to like the very idea thinking that since you are already there, you might as well enjoy the entire experience. The rest, on the other hand, would crib and act as if they are going through the torture of their lives, making it sure that the girlfriend or the wife comes to know about the same and hoping that they wouldn’t be dragged from next time around, but little do they realize they would not only become a punching bag for their better halves on reaching home but would also have to go through a hell lot of serious torture while trying to provide a proof of your love towards your better half.shopping

Intelligent are those who tend to pretend liking the entire shopping experience as they are then treated by their better halves in the most wonderful and sensual of mannerism which any guy could die for.

Does it mean that every guy should try to alter the very core of their personalities and start liking shopping? Well, not really but surely you should at least give it a thought and try to fall in the former category in case you want your love life to remain peaceful at all times.

But won’t it mean compromising too much? Wasn’t it meant to be a give and take relationship? Wasn’t it meant to be a mutually desirable and pleasurable experience?

If you guys out there are wondering about all the above questions, then you are true to the core persona, but little do you realize that when you tend to enter into a relationship, it is 90% of the time that women have a knack of making you do what you might least want to do, considering the kind of manipulation power and in turn intelligence that they seem to be born with.

I wonder why women have a stereotypical view of being called stupid and are labelled such by our society. If anyone in this world has a doubt regarding whether they are or not, might want to think about it again after giving recognition to the wonderful knack that they have developed in pursuing a guy to toe to their will.

Well, this is just one perspective and it would be unfair on my part, if I fail to present the views of the fairer sex on the same.shopping wopping

For a girl, shopping is equivalent to a lifeline that they get in return for what all they go through during their life. It is similar to a guy’s lifeline of say watching IPL or any sports or pursuing any particular hobby that is so near and dear to him.

It surely makes them happy. A guy would wonder why and how spending nearly half the guy’s income can make anybody happy, but the truth is, that it does for majority of the girls. After all, it is about maintaining a certain level of happiness quotient in life, which they do so by indulging in shopping. Not to mention that there are indeed mature souls on this planet who take a different view altogether and who spend only when there is enough to spend and do not dive into a careless spree of buying anything and everything that comes to their mind.

Recently, I happened to be talking to one such mature lady, a relative (R) of mine (M), with whom I happened to have a wonderful conversation regarding shopping.

You know, it feels really nice when my husband asks me to go out with him to the market place. It does not necessarily mean that I would spend money but just the idea of my husband taking care of my feelings and giving what I want a consideration makes me happy.”—–R

Yes, I can understand. It feels that the other person cares for you.”—-M

Ya, absolutely! Also, I like seeing new things. I like witnessing the kind of fashion that is prevalent now a days. I like to do window shopping more than actually going out there and buying every possible item I can think of. It is also about spending some quality time with your husband which you normally don’t get a chance because you are so engrossed in your daily routine and don’t find time for such activities. It is very much a break for all ladies.”—-R

True. And everyone desires a change from the monotony that ensues courtesy the kind of Indian society we all happen to live in, where the woman in the house, at least from your generation is expected to get up everyday in the morning and is expected to take care of all the needs of not only the husband and children but also the entire family, ranging from grandfather to brother-in-laws, especially in a joint family.”—-M

Ya, and see how wonderfully we do this job, without any complaints and with full devotion. It looks pretty easy but can be really taxing and tiring. No man can take on such a responsibility because they are not made that way by God. I guess he had special plans when it came to taking care of the family needs and every woman of my generation should take great pride in the things we do.”—-R

True, and hats off to all the ladies and my mother for having done so for so long.”—-M

Ok, you tell me. Men call it a give and take relationship. So, for what we do, don’t we deserve an evening out with the man in our lives, where we can get to enjoy buying new things, which by the way, most of the times are related to the needs of the family and the household. So it is not that we are always buying something for ourselves. We buy keeping in mind everything that might be required by the family. In a way, we are still on duty keeping every little thing in our mind at all times and ensuring that everyone remains happy in our house. After hearing all this, you tell me, whether it is too much a demand that our husbands always seem to crib about?”—-R

Well, I had no answer to the last question that she asked and I seemed a totally transformed person after the entire conversation. Indeed the woman of our lives does take care of all the things that we can possibly think of. In different roles whether it be of a daughter, or a wife or a mother, she tends to fulfill every little expectation that the society has from her. Doesn’t she deserve a better treatment from all the guys?shopping boy

Come on, guys! It is not much that is being asked of you. And I am sure that all of us are capable of doing much better in life :).

Source for Image: http://creoleindc.typepad.com/rantings_of_a_creole_prin/shopping/, http://www.thymegraphics.co.uk/products.asp?cat=37, http://www.vectorstock.com/royalty-free-vector/shopping-girl-and-boy-vector-499613

2 States in my family!

Chetan Bhagat is one guy who has inspired not only me but so many budding writers who wanted to write but could never take that courage to delve into the same, courtesy the kind of remuneration that the industry offers and courtesy the kind of success rate associated with the same.

His inspiration has not been limited to his breed and has instead gone much beyond the same, courtesy the kind of books he has written which has made a significant impact on the lives of so many, not only in India but also across the seven seas.2 states

And one such person happens to be my very own sister-in-law (saali) who would soon get married to a Tamil guy, hailing from the same college as hers. Courtesy, 2 States, the world has become much more open to accepting the concept of getting married in a different caste, religion or region.

On my part, I am extremely excited that I would get a chance to witness the much awaited 2 States like wedding taking place in my in-laws house in a few days time. The concept of two families hailing from two totally different backgrounds and having totally different perceptions would be seen coming together to have a consensus on a common issue.

The excitement seems to have caught everyone in the family, with my brother-in-law even contemplating getting dressed in a lungi, similar to the likes of the bridegroom and my sister-in-laws all set to adorn kerala style sarees. 

How wonderful it would be if the two parties to the contract decide to get dressed in a manner suited to the likes of the other party, with the Tamil family dressing in a North Indian style and the north Indian family dressing in a Tamil attire!

If this is not the real manifestation of unity in diversity, then I wonder what is! Wouldn’t it be amazing if the entire world could take a cue from such examples of unison and get motivated to drive away the enmity and conflicts evolving from regionalism?

Wouldn’t it be nice to see the next generation getting a chance to experience both cultures at home and imbibing values that are extremely essential when it comes to the unity and integrity of our country?

Being an ardent Shahrukh Khan fan that I am, I would want to see much more of such marriages taking place in our country.Arranged-marriage-image

May be what the government in our country and an amendment in the Special Marriage Act has not been able to accomplish so far, can be achieved by a concept which has become part and parcel of every person who happen to be living in this territory which we all refer to as India. 

Source for Image: http://entertainment.oneindia.in/bollywood/movies/2-states/wallpapers.html