Let Go You-Bama!

The moment I hear the phrase, “let go“, I am taken back in time and am reminded of the movie Zindagi na Milegi Dobara where just before the sky dive, Hrithik Roshan tells Farhan Akhtar, let go, Imran, just let it go!

When I think about it, there it was letting go of the fear, yet it has very deep connotations and implications for all of us in our day-to-day lives,

no matter which part of the World we reside in,

no matter what religion we practice and

no matter what field or sector we are working in.

Day-in-day-out, we try to do best for ourselves and our loved ones whom we refer to as family or friends,

we try to be successful in whatever we do, be it personal or professional,

we try to have fun, which by the way was supposed to be a natural way of living, though we have found a way to make it hard enough to explore and practice,

we try to use our time to the best of our skills and capabilities, intending to get a better house, a better car, at times even the best breed of dog to be bred at home;

yet we see the life drifting away at a mindless pace, where we don’t even get the time to contemplate and realize that we are not gonna take everything that we are accumulating at this point in time, with us.

So, difficult it is to let go, be it our identities (religious, caste, creed etc.),

be it our set of possessions (a pair of trousers, gadgets etc.),

be it our so called loved ones, to the extent, that at times we tend to suffocate them supposedly for their own good, not realizing that we are in fact doing more harm than good, by imposing all the societal stuff,

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Not realizing that not letting go, on the contrary, is

making us fret more,

get frustrated more,

get angry on a frequent basis,

become comparative and in turn jealous more often than not,

making us go through the consequences of bad health;

Yet we continue to do so, without stopping for a moment to give it a thought, whether it’s all worth it.

After all, the beautiful time that we have been bestowed with, in the form of human, do you think, it was supposed to do all the above?

Well even if you were to argue really hard in its favour, few might say, to some extent,

Yet you know, deep down in your hearts and minds, that it’s all a game that you have been taught to play by the society, which giving up right now is more of a challenge and fear, arising out of the conditioned insecurities.

The only question that you need to ask yourself is, do you consider yourself important enough (to the likes of Obama, Bill Gates etc.)  to not let go?

For if it was not that, you would have by now, actually decided to let go. I guess, even they have, to some extent, that is! 😉

Source for the Image: http://www.lovethispic.com/image/20870/let-go

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It’s all about Playing Games!

Sports has had a very integral role in my growing up years. Has been instrumental in teaching me things which I will cherish all my life. What comes along with playing sports is you get into a habit of watching sports and when it be the biggest sporting event, one can hardly miss upon the wonderful performances.

Yes, Olympics did have its own set of controversies and accomplishments, which each one of us know and would not really want to get into the complexities of the same. What I would instead want to talk about is few things which I learnt from my sporting years, both playing and watching, and which I think are extremely relevant when it comes to leading our day-to-day lives.

I still remember, cable connection used to be a luxury at home only to be availed during our summer holidays because my mom was very particular about her kids not wasting time on the same and instead wanted us to focus on academics.

Those were the days, when on a Sunday, if there was supposed to be a cricket match being played between India and another nation, when I would get up around 5 or so in the morning to first play my favorite sports and then get ready to watch it at a friend’s place.

Probably, the ease with which one becomes disciplined with no one else telling you all the time to do so, was the biggest habit which I was drawn into, courtesy sports. Now I realize how his gets translated to any other aim or goal that you set for yourself and carve out a path to achieve the same, which comes pretty naturally to you and makes it a cake walk when it comes to adapting yourself to the grueling schedule.images

While, on the field, since it’s a team sports and your victory is determined by how everyone else is performing, a team sports, no matter how much you would want to, doesn’t give you the liberty to become selfish, instead teaches you to do your job selflessly, striving towards a larger goal at all times.

Such great mentoring, especially during the formative years of a child, instills in him/her an ability to think beyond one’s profit and loss and instead focus on the common good, leaving little scope for comparisons and the resulting jealousy, in turn enabling one to lead a much happier life.

The wonderful think about sports like any other other field is the adulation that one gets when one wins. Though it has its own confidence boosting effect, at the same time, it more often than not, leads to over-confidence and ego.

But as with every other thing, this two has its in-built neutralizing formula, where in you don’t always win, but lose as well. It’s incredible how the ego comes shattering down when you brag and lose, in turn teaching you a very important lesson in life, which is to remain balanced at every point of time in your life and take success and failures in the same stride.

Another extra-ordinary thing about sports is that it teaches you that there are no limits to what you can achieve. In every tournament new records are set, which inspires every individual to have faith in his/her ability to go beyond the usual, and more importantly to think that one can actually cross the line with better efforts, thereby motivating one to continue with the hard work.

And the most important of all that sports teaches you is, that nothing comes easy. You have to put in the hard work, you have to make each moment, each day count for the incremental improvements to take place, you have to be conscious of the fact that it needs to be worked upon.

Doesn’t it sound similar to working on any social relationship in the World that we tend to get into during the wonderful journey that we all call life, be it spouse or kids?

If it does hit your realization, then make sure you and your family get into a habit of playing sports, for it’s all about playing games and the more you play with the right spirit, the more satisfied and happy you would be in life.

Source for Image: https://sites.jmu.edu/103fall14/are-youth-sports-too-competitive-draft-i/

Stay Calm! Stay Put!

With the kind of routine that we tend to follow at times, getting up in the morning can indeed be a treat to the eyes, considering that we get to witness the authority that the sun tends to impose on us all, rising from apparently nowhere and turning the heat on, literally.

Our elders always tell us: early to bed, early to rise makes one healthy, wealthy and wise. Though, I was up and around for 2′ o clock yesterday night after a session of snookers and a party thereafter, yet with a sheer determination and a will to be able to get up and witness the natural phenomenon, I was able to make it through this morning.

The cool breeze added to the romance that I seemed to be having with the natural beauty surrounding me in my garden and in true senses of the word, it was indeed a very good morning.

Talking about mornings, each morning tends to bring along with herself a new gasp of air, a renewed and rejuvenated mindset, a determination to keep doing well in life and lot of choices to be made which if done well leads to satisfaction and happiness which, for me, seems to be the goal of the society.

And one such example of a choice that would certainly bring you loads of happiness and good health is to take a morning walk. With not much noise emanating from the vehicles to trouble one, one can have their own sweet time with the nature and can try to think upon some of the issues concerning themselves and their loved ones.

To me, it presents an excellent opportunity to get away from the normal chores of life and spend some time with myself, which in turn enables me to think in a positive manner, at the same time, helps me resolve some of the issues confronting my thought process. Even if these are not resolved, I am  at least able to figure out the course of action that needs to be taken in order to handle or deal with the same.

And this morning was dedicated to a conversation that I happened to have yesterday night with one of the most learned and coolest of doctors whom I have ever met. It is often that when we are drunk to the extent of feeling good about things then we tend to discuss things which we wont otherwise.

Without going into the details of the conversation that I had, one thing that can be called the moral of the discussion was that in order to have a successful relationship, either party needs to cool down when the other party tends to heat up.

The problem arises when both the parties tend to be on the same side of the table representing a hypothetical average between the cooler and hotter sides of the temperature gradient. And then a smallest of thing can take the shape of a Frankenstein monster threatening the very existence of a relationship.

So, all the couples out there who are prone to having discussions about little things in life, you can definitely try to learn from what the larned doctor had to say about the ingredients that should be included in this recipe of a relationship, which will go a long way in keeping your relationship intact, at the same time making it more enjoyable and fulfilling.

Source for Image: http://www.orkut-scraps.world4art.com/good-morning/good-morning-01.php, http://natashatobin.com/blog/?attachment_id=248

What a Guy calls Torture !

Baby, I love you na!”–Guy

“Jhoot, sab jhoot! You don’t care for me. You keep roaming with friends. You don’t have any time for me.”–Girl

Of course not baby! You know even when I am around with friends, I keep thinking about you.”–Guy

Very funny! Then why didn’t you give me a call?”–Girl

Oh wo to because I was driving na! And moreover my battery was so low that I couldn’t even send you a message.”–Guy

What rubbish! If you really wanted to talk to me, you could have called me up from your friend’s cell or a PCO.”–Girl

Hey, guess what! I gotta surprise for you.”–Guy (tries to change the topic of conversation)

“Is it? What? Now it better be good for you have lots n lots to make up to me.”–Girl

Well, these are not dialogues from some movie of the genre of DCH (I am sure you all remember the character played by Saif Ali Khan), but a real life talking example between a girl and a guy, who finally takes a sigh of relief having deviated the girl away from the topic that he so hates to discuss, but is forced to do so anyway, because of the very perseverance shown by the girl.

It’s not that the girl doesn’t understand that the guy is trying to take her away from the crux of the matter, but she believes in letting him go until the next time, as she thinks that she has thrown enough of tantrums for this time, and moreover she awaits thesurprisethat is supposed to be coming her way.

The guy, on the other hand, thinks that how intelligent he is, for managing to escape from the topic and for having restored normalcy in the relationship again. Though, he doesn’t have the slightest of notions about what is in store for him in times to come when this very example and many more would be cited in order to initiate a conversation (more so a fight), which would totally be guided by the mood of the girl.

In short, the guy doesn’t realize that he has become, nothing, but a slave of the wishes of his girlfriend. Soon after, what follows is as good as anyone’s guess. A series of quarrelling which soon turn into serious debates about relationships and what results in the end is a breakup.

On being asked to the guy as to what had resulted in him and his girlfriend resorting to such an action, his answer is pretty much reflective of his understanding and perception about a relation, which is nothing but immensely immature.

She made my life hell, you see. She didn’t give me any space. I felt so constrained that I couldn’t really breathe.”–Guy’s explanation

Somehow, I have heard and listened to such explanations so often, that there was a time when I seriously started doubting the intention of a girl. The ever reverberating question kept stimulating my mind: What does a girl really want? Is she always after the life of a guy?

On going a bit deeper into the complex nature of the relationship, I realized that it all starts withpep talkwherein a guy tries to do any and everything in order to woo the girl. He resorts to actions which might be totally incompatible with the basic personality of the guy, which in turn develops expectations on part of the girl, which the guy would never be able to fulfill in the future, sheerly because it doesn’t match the very basic nature of the guy.

As a result one can hear the girl saying:Tum to aise nahi the. Kitna badal gaye ho tum,which if we think from the girl’s perspective is so true.

Having said the above, what one really wants to know is whether there is a solution to the whole dynamics that I have described above.

I believe that for any realtionship to succeed, the most important ingredient is honesty. One needs to be honest to both oneself and his/her partner. It is extremely important to put your true self in front of a person whom you are thinking of spending your whole life with.

There is absolutely no requirement what so ever for faking or doing something which you are not capable of doing and which you certainly will not be doing in the future.

At the same time, the girl should understand that there is a general pattern or a curve that every relationship follows. With the relationship becoming more and more mature, things certainly are bound to change. The form of expression of love might change. The depth of conversations might become more mature and serious at times.

This, in no way, is reflective of the fact that the love quotient has gone down between the couple or the relationship has lost the charm that it once had. It is just indicative of a fact that the relationship has become more strong and solid.

In the end, what a guy calls torture is a result of his own activites at times and as a guy, one should try to abide by the principles of honesty.

The question that needs to be understood more than answering is: “Can you honestly love a dishonest thing?”

Source for Image: http://www.milliondollarmarriage.me/honesty-trust-respect-love, http://www.ortegaumc.org/pages/pastor_notes_8-15-10.html