P2P Competition!

You know what, my son Siddharth is doing great in his coaching classes for IIT Jee. Today, his teacher was telling me that he would surely make it to top 100″, says a parent P1 to another parent P2, who is the father of Shreya, who’s Siddharth classmate.

Oh, is it! That’s wonderful. Shreya is somewhat lagging behind in Chemistry. I just hope she is able to catch up, am a little concerned whether she will be able to qualify the exam”, responds P2.

You know what, you should start sending Shreya to this wonderful coaching institute in our neighbourhood, if you really want her to succeed”, P1, being a proud parent that he is, is always on look-out to offer free advise to other parents living in the same community.

I guess, you are right! Let me enrol her in the same program as Siddharth”, conforms P2.

If you are wondering whether P1 and P2 might just be an exception to the rule when it comes to parents demonstrating concerns for their kids, think again, for that’s what you tend to see in majority of parents these days.

What most kids’ routine would look like in today’s competitive world:

5:00 am Good morning

6:00 am Tutor at home, who takes care of kid’s Science and Math lessons

7:30 am Kid goes to school in an air-conditioned bus of the respective school which has curtains, and kids seem to be cut off from the world outside, few among who, spent most of the time in the bus, browsing on the internet, or watching some random video or chit chatting on Whatsapp

3:30 pm School gets over, kid sits in the same bus, comes back home, around 4:30 if he/she is lucky enough and his/her house comes first in the list of the drop-offs

5:00 pm After a quick snack of sorts, kid has some extra-curricular lesson with a relevant tutor coming to the house, be it a piano session or a tabla session, for kids need to excel in not only their studies but also other things, which gives a parent an opportunity to showcase their kid as a trophy of sorts to the who’s who of their society 

6:30 pm Kid goes to a coaching institute, where he/she is supposed to prepare for a competitive exam

8:00 pm Kid comes back to the house, totally drained out, but wait a minute, he/she needs to complete a set of assignments given either by the morning tutor or the school

9:30 pm Kid gets a chance to have his/her dinner and by the time, he/she is able to finish the same, there is no energy left whatsoever to remain awake, yet he/she, courtesy the mobile phone, spends sometime on the same, before falling asleep

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And this continues for the entire year, which goes against the very fundamentals of how a kid should spent his/her wonderful childhood years.

Courtesy the quality of teachers we have in the system, the school system kills the inherent curiosity of a kid, ensuring that he/she is thrown into the rat race from the very moment, he/she is able to perceive the world in a certain manner.

Courtesy the eagerness of the parents to see their kids not lagging behind, the kid suffers tremendous stress, few of them succumbing at times to the same, few who might be lucky enough to not meet the same fate as above, end up spending the wonderful years of their life in a tizzy.

Courtesy the immediate society who are thriving on the vary act of comparison, ensures that the kid, who is so called not able to make it big, ends up going through a mental and emotional trauma, which surely leads to having repercussion in the latter half of their life.

What a waste, I would say!

Just because competing with someone has become the very basis of life, parents have a tendency to put their kid through enormous amount of stress.

Just because a parent considers it as their right to get their expectations fulfilled by their kids, they forget that the very life they have brought into this world is meant to experience and explore, rather than just meeting those man-made targets.

It’s high time that we as a society and parents begin to realise, that what we define as success, is it really the case?

And if not, then why the hell we are bent upon putting our kids through such torture.

My advice:

Calm down parents, be sensible, for this competition among yourselves would end up in being a disaster for not only your kid, but also for the society as a whole.

Source for the Image: http://www.altonschools.org/index.cfm?page=1045

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Clear Logbook_Bit by Bit!

Quite interesting, if you look at how kids are brought up. As a being feeling extremely excited to see themselves happening on this planet, I assume, a kid wouldn’t have any words to express the kind of ecstasy he or she might be going through.

As they become more aware of their habitat and become so called more intellect and educated, they have an entire logbook created for themselves by themselves, with contributions coming from different stakeholders in his/her life, be it parents, teachers, friends, relatives etc etc. , primarily aimed at making them all economically or financially successful, wonder whether this could come anywhere close to the definition of success, for success leads to misery on most occasions in our society these days.

What results is a logbook of do’s and don’ts, of what is possible and what’s impossible, achievable or cannot be achieved, the idea about what’s right or wrong, the conceptualization of morality and ethics, putting one inside a cage of sorts with a plethora of restrictions and boundation hanging right over one’s head.

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With no means at hand to escape from the obvious stress and displeasure, one seeks a help, be it medical, social etc., not getting which one might get prone to taking the disastrous step of ending one’s own physical self.

What becomes most important in such situations is a tool which can help them clear the logbook that they have created over a period of time, which has actually handicapped them of their abilities to live life to its full potential.

What might also become a thing of priority is to find that all important person, who can enable this clearance of the logbook. Even if not, one can explore doing the same through a customized approach, fitting in best with one’s natural self, as to who best other than oneself can understand one.

Admitting that it cannot be done by a single stroke of luck, one needs to work upon it in a conscious manner over a period of time, removing and clearing the annoying bits over a period of sustained strive and determination.

The only question is whether you want to give it a shot, which could be your last chance, by the way 😉 , to give yourself another opportunity to live life to the fullest?

Source of the Image: https://logbook.readthedocs.io/en/stable/

Mission ADAM!

ADAM, a term mostly associated with you know whom (EVE), can have a different connotation for some, for me it’s ANOTHER DAY ANOTHER MORNING!

If you are wondering why I am going crazy about ADAM, you are right, it’s inspired and in fact dedicated to a person with whom I have had a chance to converse in the past month or so which has resulted in ringing the bells, as is always the case, when you happen to come across some kind of an eye opener.

Alright, let me ask you a question, when was the last time you happen to write a letter to someone? Or let’s say, an email? to some near or dear one or a friend, or your girlfriend/boyfriend, or your wife/husband, or your parents, who by the way, are well equipped with all the technology tools and big kudos to them for their fantastic efforts.

If not, why not write one today. I have always believed and wondered at the same time, how simple words written on a piece of paper/email, coming straight from the heart, can have such a wonderful impact on the person whom it’s addressed to.

Trust me, it doesn’t take much time, possibly 15-20 minutes of your day, if you are thinking too hard, or it could be as less as 5 minutes, if you are in the flow.

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It could be anything that you can pen down, an apology which you might have not said for fighting with your parents, lets say, on the previous night; it could be a love letter, am sure all the youngsters are pretty good at that, if not can become one ;); it could be a simple how was your day? kind of a letter which makes you more connected with the world around you; it could be about a trip whose experience you might want to share with your friends/family or for that matter anything random that’s coming to you on a particular day/time.

This wonderful art of expression, which used to be the only means of communicating when there were no phones/pagers, seem to be disappearing day by day.

There is where ADAM pitches in. It helps you keep track of the life that many of us seem to be floundering without being conscious about the same. It helps keep you grounded and enables you to keep a check on the mindless consumerism that you might have got into. It surely has a therapeutic impact, for it’s always good to take it out of your system, rather than feeding those cancerous cells inside your body with the thoughts.

You know the best thing to do is to not listen to someone, but try for yourself, every morning, for 15 minutes, that you can of course take out from your busy schedules, adhere to Mission ADAM and see it transform your lives in a huge way.

If not for yourself, then do it for your loved ones, for sharing is caring and what best you can share other than your time and thoughts.

So guys, are you ready to see Mission ADAM transform all your lives in a fantastic manner? 🙂

Source for Image: https://www.lds.org/manual/old-testament-stories/chapter-3-adam-and-eve?lang=eng

Seek the Right Person

There was a time when, one would have to wait for a week or even a month before some news could be delivered via the medium of letters. One used to wait to hear that tring tring emanating from the bicycle of the very man in uniform whom we used to call postman.

Times have changed. One, no longer, needs to wait for a piece of news. Instead, it can be delivered instantaneously using the various mediums that are available to us.

Indeed, it has led to a revolution when it comes to exchanging information and has in turn enhanced the ability of a person to respond quickly to a situation or to take an ad-hoc decision.

Where there have been so many pros, some elders in our society have a totally different take on the same and this pertains more to a sociological point of view.

According to them, the revolution in IT and Communications has led to increase in fights and dissent amongst the members of a family.

In older times, since the information could not be transmitted so easily, one tended not to take advice or be guided from others and in turn was forced to developing their own thinking and their own perceptions about a thing or a situation.

Now a days, according to the elders, everytime there is a fight in a family or amongst its members, what one does is to resort to making a phone call to the nearest person at hand.

What it does is, that the family matters tend to sneek out of the enclosures provided by the walls of a house. In case the person from whom the advice is being seeked is a well-wisher, things tend to normalize as he/she tends to give theappropriateadvice.

But, if the person is not a well-wisher then he/she might tend to create all kinds of issues in the family, thereby creating a divide amongst its members, at the same time ensuring that the family is exposed to public gaze, which can have deadly societal consequences.

Thus, what the elders would like to suggest is that family matters should be resolved within the chaar-diwari.

On one hand, where talking to the right person might lead to release of stress and frustration emerging from a situation, on the other hand it can end up real bad if the person from whom the advice is seeked turns out to be a crook.

With the kind of society that we are living in and with the kind of taboo attached to seeking professional help, one needs to bring a change in the perception associated with the act of going to a psychiatrist or the act of seeking professional help e.g. going to a counsellor.

This will not only help reduce the various problems emanating because of stress and tension but would also help in maintaining stability in our society.

Source for Image: http://www.dreamstime.com/royalty-free-stock-image-royalty-free-stock-image-finding-right-person-image15849016