The Unsung Intelligence!

How many times have you heard statements such as these: “are tum karti hi kya ho? mujhse poochon mujhe kya kya karna padta hai office mein.”

A very common monologue that you might have heard the men in our society iterate this to their better halves at every chance they get to demonstrate their superiority (at least this is the case for the majority of the families in India, I am not referring to the modern lot here, who might have been able to get rid of the monkey off their backs, explicitly if not implicitly).

Somehow, the paternalisitc society that we all live in tend to make the women in their respective families look very small, ignoring completely the significant contribution they have to make towards their families’ growth, in turn enhacing the well being of the family.

As a result, the women in our society tend to have a distorted self-image which in turn have a bearing on their confidence and personality.

As far as playing their respective part and role in a relationship is concerned, this is beyond doubt that they tend to give in much more than what their male counterpart has to offer.

Still, they don’t end up getting their due share of respect and appreciation that they so deserve. For those guys who think just the above, let me tell you that your conception about the value that your better half might be adding to your life is totally distorted.

From getting up in the morning and taking care of all the chores to making sure that everything gets done on time for you is not so simple as it might look to you. Those men who have had the opportunity to do all this for just a day would completely want to agree with me about the enormity of the task that I am talking about.

In all senses of the word, the women are the real managers of our country and society. If it was not for them doing the things that they do, we men would not be so happily doing our stuff.

And all this feat is unachievable without a competent and a proportionate level of intelligence. What ever you might want to call it, practical intelligence etc., women are truly very very intelligent human beings and they deserve a big applause for what and who they are.

Here is saluting the women in our lives who make us what we are. Three Cheers to Women!

Source for Image: http://edenchanges.wordpress.com/2011/02/28/give-advice-or-ideas-that-will-help-women-succeed-in-the-business-world/

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The Other Gender

Today, in the morning, I was told by one of my friends about my recent inclination to write about issues concerning women and to have forgotten about the men folk as a whole. This article in every sense of the word is solely dedicated to the stronger sex :).

It is true that the men in our society don’t really have to go through the same kind of hardships that women in our country do. Having said that, they are not left immune, they indeed have their own share of problems.

And one recent problem that I was introduced to by the same friend is regarding the expectations that a guy needs to fulfill when it comes to family, wife or society to the extent that sometimes he feels quite suffocated with the whole scheme of things which seems to him like an unresolvable situation.

His parents expect him to earn more and more, or at least better than their neighbour’s or the distant relative’s son. After all, how can they afford to be left behind in the rat race. No matter how hard he tries, what comes his way is the mere recognition of the fact that he needs to do more in life.

Wifes, in some cases, can add up to his woes. With the ever increasing materialistic nature of our lives, she tends to demand more and more and her list of wishes tend to lie on an ever increasing curve.

If this was not enough, everywhere he goes, the first question that he needs to encounter, whether he likes it or not is: “beta, kya kar rahe ho aaj kal?” As if the whole world was only interested in the work and more importantly the benefits that he is deriving from that work.

At that point of time, the guy’s situation is comparable to a donkey who is unable to get his due share even after giving up all his life in the service of people whom he loves and cares for.

Somehow the guy cannot help but ask a question that seems to be quite relevant to the whole scenario:

Why is it that I am guaged by my achievements in life and that too the materialistic ones, which is bound to fade away like a phoenix one fine day?”

Source for Image: http://livingcivil.com/expecting-is-understanding-thoughts-of-the-subconscious/expectations/

Support System

Everyday, our newspapers are flooded with reports of crimes against women folk. Everyday, someone gets burnt due to non payment of dowry, everyday some women are so brutally beaten up by their husbands that they end up being hospitalized, everyday some women are humiliated and threatened.

This makes me wonder as to what’s the reason behind such a behaviour on part of men. Are we as men trying to prove that we are physically more strong and can go to any extent of imposing our decisions on women? Are we as men become so grossly infected by our desires and whims that we tend to lose all forms of morality and dignity?

It makes me immensely sad about the increasing expression of aggression in our society. Why all the frustation and angst is taken out on the women? Why the hell have we forgotten to give due respect to women? Why are we bent upon treating women like animals?

Why have we forgotten the fact that if there was no woman then there wouldn’t be any one in this society? And the most surprising and unfortunate thing in some incidents is that women too collude with their sons or husbands and become a part of making either their daughter-in-laws or their daughters go through all the atrocities.

Whatever might be the reason for such a behaviour, the behaviour itself needs to be ridiculed and suitably punished. Indeed punishment is surely going to act as a deterrent for those who might have such motives, but we must try to dig deeper and try to focus on the root cause of such incidents.

Why are such incidents taking place? Is it in the nature of a human to be brutal? And if it is then why is is that the norms and value system in our society which is supposed to be the guiding force behind all the legal laws and codes in place and is supposed to condition a human being into a fully functional societal being, are unable to fulfill its purpose?

There must be something very wrong in our teachings that we end up doing things such as those described above. Things certainly need to change. Again the question is where should this reform process start from? Should we focus on our schools, along with homes, and try to instil teachings from Bhagvad Geeta and other religious texts in the curriculum so that our children grow up into decent and virtuous individuals?

At the end of the day, it is extremely important that individuals, in this case especially men, are taught the virtues of respecting the fairer sex. But this alone wouldn’t solve the problem. Inspite of all teachings there will surely be some deviants who would try to bring malaise to the whole system.

What is needed along with the teachings, is an establishment of a society where in women feel free and empowered to voice out their opinions. And we as virtuous men need to function as a support system for the women folk.

Source for Image: http://www.reallifecoaching.net/create-a-stress-support-system/

http://wsiezeal.com/Cultivate-Support-System

Speak Up

Yesterday, I had written about the kind of incidents that are taking place in our society and the insecurity of our parents which is but natural to arise. What is surprising though is that hundreds of such incidents such as eve teasing, go unnoticed and unreported.

Is it because our parents are scared about the social consequences that might follow the very act of reporting? Is it because our parents are well aware of the treatment that their child might have to face in our society? Is it because of the inefficiency of the justice delivery mechanisms in place in our country?

Whatever might be the reason, it is extremely important to understand that if such incidents are not reported and the perpetuaters are not booked, then it is bound to lead to an increase in the occurence of such incidents. Those involved in such acts are bound to gain in confidence and in turn their evil motives are bound to prevail over our justice system.

Such reporting needs to be supported by the investigating agencies and the judiciary in our country by providing an effective environment where in justice can be delivered in an efficient and effective manner.

But the most important question that is haunting and will continue to haunt all of us is:

Do we have the courage to come out of our houses and take a stand against such incidents happening in our society and how many of us are really prepared to support such people who are taking an initiative in this regard?

Source of Image: http://borderbuster.blogspot.in/2009/07/speak-up-on-global-trade.html

21st Century Girls: The change has already begun

The shackles that this male dominated society has been trying to put on the women are all set to be broken. And Indeed it needs to be. For long, women have been exploited by the males. In spite of them devoting themselves fully to the male cause, they have not been given the respect which they should have got.

First as a daughter, then as a wife, afterwards as a mother and grandmother, the one thing that remains common among all these roles is their attitude of giving. They have always believed in showering lots and lots of love on their close ones, even compromising, in some cases themselves, what to talk of careers.

But things seem to be changing for good in the 21st century. Girls are becoming more aware of their rights and are more outspoken about the same, at least in metropolitan cities. Yes, the situation has not much changed in smaller cities and towns, but the wave of change has started engulfing many a cities and is slowly but surely going to reach the nooks and corners.

Today, the girls from small cities and towns are making it big in whatever field they are aspiring to be successful in and that’s a refreshing thing to witness and be a part of. The only advice that I would want to give the guys is to help empower the girls and be open to the change that is taking place because it is high time that such a change should take place.

For Girls, the advice would be: “Dream On! The entire World is there to be won over and we as guys are ready to walk the path with you“.

Source for Image: http://cutegiurl.wordpress.com/2008/08/31/pics-wonder-girls-cartoon-version/

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Indian Women: The Need for a Positive Self Image

A recent survey on women have come out with a discovery that we as Indians shouldn’t be proud of at all. The findings state that Indian women are the most stressful amongst all the women worldwide.

Does this reflect somewhat on the gender structure of our society? Is it because of the expectations that Indian women need to fulfil, first as daughters and wives and later as mothers and grandmothers? Is it because of the enormous pressures that are put on girls regarding what to do and what not to do?

Whatever might be the reason, we certainly need to rectify this. In my opinion, the most unhappy are the women who try their best to meet the expectations of the males in their lives but are unable to do so and are criticized and ridiculed for the same from their better halves (I wonder whether I should change this to bad halves). Comeon Males! Stop demanding so much. Let them live their lives in their own way without being given instructions.

Secondly, women should understand that at the end of the day, its their lives, and they need to make the best use of it. The first thing they can do is to have a positive self image which will help them in increasing their confidence levels. They need to remind themselves of all the positives that they bring into their families and work places, instead of wondering about what they were unable to bring.

Some people would want to question the logic of giving independence to them (as if they are the saviours). They would want to argue that they have seen girls living independently, yet feeling the same kind of stress as their counterparts who are living under the bindings of their families. They would in turn like to question: Is it possible for women to live stress free life when it comes to being completely immune to the pressures of our society?

My answer to that would be: of course not! No one can be immune to the societal pressures. Even men face these pressures (though of different kinds at times). But one thing that can certainly reduce the stress for women and that is to have a positive self image about themselves.

Source for Image: http://artsytime.com/top-10-hottest-cartoon-characters/